Friday Fragments - June 25, 2010

Friday Fragments is a great opportunity to review the bits and pieces of the week, to post little fragments that don't quite make a full post. Click the button and follow the fun!

*I'm firmly back into my routine of morning walks.  YAY me!  I've even coerced The Husband to venture out once this week.  We've yet to establish a routine for him, but we're working on it.
*Are you watching the World Cup?  I'm not a sports watcher or follower... or really a fan, but I feel compelled to follow the American team.  So I had The Husband record Wednesday's game and then we watched when I got off work.  On fast forward.  Yes, we blew through a 3.5 hour game in twenty-eight minutes.  We did slow it down for the last five minutes and DAMN! What a fine game!  We have Saturday's game already set up to record.  And yes, we plan to watch it the same way on fast forward.

*I successfully pulled another office prank. *Insert cheesy smile*  My prank buddy walked into the bathroom and I tried to grab the door from her but she got inside and locked it before I could (single seater with a real door - not a stall).  So I pulled one of the waiting area chairs (big livingroom style heavy chair) and put it in front of the door and SAT IN IT.  While she was in there I truly hoped this was a quick trip because it could really be embarrassing.  Fortunately she was quick and as soon as she realized the door was blocked, she screamed my name.  HOW DID SHE KNOW?  tee hee

*This weekend is devoted to clearing off the table with the Wii and computer so I can set up my sewing machine again.  I have a few projects brewing in my head and they need to come out or I might explode.  I promise to take pictures, but understand it might not be until November before you see anything.  Do I need to clarify that would be pictures of my craftiness and not my head exploding???  Prank Buddy might be reading so some things need to be drawn out for her. (Hey, Butt Nugget, you officially have an office nickname!)  She is soooooooooooooo gunna get me.

Friday Fragments - June 11, 2010

Hang tight, loves, my little world has devolved into a huge fragmented mess...

First I need to post a huge tribute of my gratitude for having a totally wonderful supervisor.  I've had some really craptastic bosses with ego problems, some were completely oblivious, another was a sexist prick, oh and then there was Charlie who I probably learned the most from by him violating virtually every HR/Equal Opportunity rule possible.  But a good supervisor?  One that doesn't hover but still teaches?  One that can keep your ego in check without making you feel like shit?  One that under every circumstance has your back?  THAT is an awesome supervisor and I have the very good fortune to have just such a person in my life.

A few days ago I was so extremely and justifiably pissed off, Beloved Supervisor swoops in and talks me down.  Yesterday, however, a whole different problem presented itself and I was quickly slipping into total melt down.  I swear this guy needs a cape.  He spent the better part of the day checking in on me, talking me through the problem.  Near the end of the day he asked what I wanted, all I could say is "I just want to toss myself on the ground and have a temper tantrum!" He grinned and told me when there was something he could do to let him know.

So what had me in such a tizzy?  My freaking desk.  A few years ago an office planner came in and sat down specifically with me to draw up an ideal work space.  She presented me with a desk I LOVED and ADORED and could write love songs about.  If it were possible I would hug my desk every day.  People would stop and comment how perfect this desk was for me.  But change is afoot and the work space next to my area is getting restructured.  I understood fully when the office planner returned that my space was going to be impacted.  I agreed, and still do, with the changes necessary for that space.  Some of the perks she described for my space sounded kind of cool.  Yesterday as the guys reconstructed the two spaces it became VERY apparent that I was getting a standard cubicle.  And while some of the walls have since been removed, it's still nothing near the fabulous work surface someone who frequently has three to seven laptops open and running at the same time needs.  No I was given a space with "lots" of "great" storage... for a standard office clerk, someone with lots of files.  I don't have that.  In fact besides needing a place to stash my purse I really don't need more than a single drawer for storage.  What I need is copious amounts of counter top.   I will overcome and find a way to make peace with this decision but I am sooooo not happy about it.

BLAH let's move on okay?

Yesterday was my due date 21 years ago.  I'm working on the posts about the pregnancy, delivery and resulting child like I did for the birthdays of his brother and sister.  Since I'm moving away from maintaining two blogs I will post that here.  If you want to catch up on the long ass posts about my other two children go here (pregnancy, delivery, and child) for 1st Child and here (pregnancy, delivery, and child) for 3rd Child.  Then come back next week for the story about 2nd Child.

In a couple days I will be going on a little roadtrip with my mom.  We're driving to Kansas City.  For those not familiar that would be 250 miles or just over four hours to get across the state of Missouri.  Highway 70 isn't particularly scenic, but I might snap a few shots just for your benefit.  So why are we venturing to the other side of the state????  We are going to sit for three days in a library doing genealogy research.  Exciting huh?  Living big, aren't we?  Great way to work on my savage neon-white geek glow.  I know you're jealous.  Actually, I'm quite excited about it.  I've been doing genealogy research for nearly fifteen years and have acquired a tremendous amount of information.  I'm having trouble deciding what branch of the family tree to focus on so I'm worried I will waste a lot of time spinning my wheels dabbling in a little bit of everything.

Wish me luck in continuing my morning walks.  I was really good about them last fall but then it got cold and dark in the morning so I hibernated.  When I was ready to start back up this spring I twisted the crap out of my foot and just haven't been able to motivate myself to get back out there.  This week I've been on my walks every morning.  Loaded with my schizophrenic iPod bouncing from Poison to Pam Tillis to AC/DC I've been huffing along at a pretty good pace, something I haven't done before.  My walks were more of a morning meander, now there seems to be energy and purpose.  Of course fueled by pissy tizzies maybe I have a lot of energy and purpose to work off.

Thank you for reading through my muddled week.  Now click on the buttons below and read about everyone else's world

A Tuesday Trend

A change in weather and waking up waayyy too early I find myself very sluggish this morning and forgoing my walk. Through my super OCD record keeping skills it turns out that I've only managed ONE Tuesday morning walk. One. As in there is an issue with Tuesday mornings?

At work I have come to the realization that Monday's are incredibly difficult because I never know what I'm walking into. There is just no way to predict how that day is going to play out, what emergency is waiting for me, what catastrophe is just minutes away. Monday have been consistently inconsistent. Tuesday's on the other hand are cleanup for Monday. Whatever had been originally on my plate will finally be addressed on Tuesday as well as any finishing touches for Monday's surprise projects.

I guess Tuesday morning is just too much for me to drag out of bed, knowing what I will be walking into.

Is not knowing better?

The Sounds Of Silence

Simon and Garfunkle sang about a post-apocolyptic silence but they totally missed the ones that happen in nature.

Snowfall

You don't think of that silence, can't even conjure it up in your head, until snowflakes start drifting around you and there, aha, is the absolute silence that is snow. It's a beautiful silence, not eerie. Now fog has it's own brand of quiet, more muffled, definitely eerie. It's strange how all of the little sounds seem to keep happening with fog, but like I said muffled, yet during snow everything just stops. Maybe it's to take in the beauty of snow falling out of the sky. It's pretty awesome and that right there is why I love snow.

All of this came to mind this morning as another unique sound enveloped me. Overcast early morning.

Okay, now I've really lost it, right? But there is a sound that hasn't struck me until just today and that was the muffled, eerie whistling of the highway. Most of my life I have lived less than a mile away from a highway so this is a familiar sound. It happens only the early morning. It's more pronounced in the wee hours not because the highway is busier than any other time of the day, but because the rest of the world is quieter allowing the highway sounds to consume the air.

It also brings a physical response to me - nausea. Isn't that lovely?

We can blame it on my freak family that insisted any travel MUST begin prior to sunrise. That means dragging me out of bed at times like 3 and 4 am. I am not a morning person. I cannot jolt out of bed and start buzzing around with daily chores and hold lively conversations. Actually if I jolt out of bed I feel queasy. Very much a low blood sugar issue. I am slow and sluggish, not very alert, and certainly not chatty. My preferred method of strolling out of bed involves laying in bed for several minutes, maybe an hour, THINKING about the fact that I ought to get up. Or listening to music.

This is why my daughter was the most astonished about my morning walks, "You don't eat breakfast first????"

Yes I am very much a fanatic about breakfast and usually am not operable until some food has hit my stomach. But I manage to get out of bed (after a few minutes of thinking about it), get dressed and take my walk. Totally amazing. I even write these blog entries before eating. Now if you wanted to hold a conversation? Completely out of the question. I can barely be civil.

So today I heard the eerie whistling highway sounds. It sang to my stomach before my head could register the sound. It reminded me of motels and morning nausea and car rides that would go for a couple of hours before my parents would feed me breakfast and motion sickness. The only thing to soothe that beast is the smell of pancakes, bacon, and coffee - the smell of Denny's or a breakfast joint. The smell of sweet relief.

I think we'll have pancakes and bacon for dinner tonight.

Walking the Dog

A gentle rain greeted me for this morning's walk. I detoured the park and just made a simple lap up and down my street. There is enough incline to almost constitute a hill, in other words make me gasp for air. It reminds me of people who walk their dogs.

I live on a street where it must be mandatory to own a dog. I failed to read the decree and thus own no dog. One kind lady brings her giant horselike poodle to my frontyard to that little strip of land between the street and the sidewalk to allow the beast to pee. I am grateful that no larger loads are deposited, but still, I have been known to dart to my car barefoot so that means I'm wading through dog urine. Lovely.

I think of all the people in this neighborhood that routinely walk their dogs, dutifully carrying plastic bags to clean up any mess. Yesterday I drove past an apartment with a man sitting on the steps loosely holding the leash while the dog did his business. The look on the dog's face, yes there was in fact a look, was despair. Don't dogs want privacy? At least to be able to duck behind a tree away from the eyes of the world?

Having owned a dog, I understand the need for one to get outside. We had the good fortune of having a fenced yard so routine walks morning, noon and night weren't necessary. Just open the door and let him run. He chose a secluded spot behind the garage to attend to his needs and then came prancing back to the door to come in. If he had an extra burst of energy he would run around the yard, dig holes and flip the motorcycle-tire-chew-toy around a few times. On days like today with a gentle rain he would stand in the kitchen trying to will his bladder into submission, doing the pee pee dance, to avoid going in the rain. Yes an eighty pound pit bull was scared of getting wet.

So I wonder on today's walk, why can't dogs be box trained like cats? Has anyone tried it? With a huge dog like my pit bull that may not be all that savory of an idea, but what about those miniature teacup sized beasts? The ones smaller than a guinea pig? Surely they would revel in the idea of not having to wait for mom or dad to return home? They have a house large enough to expend their energy so the only reason to take one on a walk is something that could be resolved with a plastic tub and cat litter. Right?

Yes, I solve all of the world's problems on my walks. You can thank me now.

One Month

After one month of dragging my ass out of bed and schlepping around the park don't you think I would finally get to the point of it being as regular as brushing my teeth? Not something I argue with myself about? The worst that happens with my teeth is I get to work, smack myself in the head for FORGETTING to brush. I don't whine in my head like I did to my mom in school - I don't wanna get up.

I actually slept in two days ago. That was okay because after I got up I realized it was raining really hard. And I permit myself a day here and there of not going. But I'm not launching out the door in exuberance. I was sort of doing that in the beginning.

Oh wait. I get it. That beginner's excitement that wanes. OH!

So I just need to suck it up and keep with it. On today's walk I came to the realization that when it's really cold and dark that we will have a time change so it shouldn't be quite so dark out. Hey that's cool. It won't change the temperature any and that is a huge problem. Then I will start whining about stupid Missouri weather all over again.

Walking Music

I was just hooked up with a site where you can download podcasts with sets of walking music. Rather cool, don't you think? When i remember to sync my ipod and then actually take it with me I'll let you know how it works out. Chances are it will end up being driving music.

http://www.kissmyblackass.org/?page_id=86

BLAH

As I read through past postings I'm a little bored. This reads like a freaking diary. "Dear diary I took a walk" BLAH!!!

I cry laughing every time I read The Bloggess. SHE is funny. She obviously has ADD. I totally follow her line of thinking or lack thereof.

So I will try to kick it up, make it more interesting, more fun, more... me.

........................

Yes today was another walk. In the parking lot was something akin to a traveling Curves shop. Seriously. There was a SUV with a bunch of exercise equipment strewn out behind it. Three women were working out with the equipment, a fourth jogging in circles. It's one thing to go to a gym and work out, it's another to get up before dawn, meet up with other exercise freaks, drive to a park, get out the equipment and start working it.

I don't know, that's too much effort. I mean I just jump out of bed, change clothes, put on shoes and grunt at my son before waltzing out the door. Bam I'm out and back in fifteen minutes. It's practically no effort at all.

Meeting up with people? In the morning? That really violates my morning prerogatives. It would involve being pleasant and engaging in mindless, friendly chatter. Holy crap I am soooo not up to that. I prefer not to talk in the morning. If I have to I'm usually annoying. It sounds happy and chipper but it's an act. It's how I am able to belt out bad opera to wake my kids.

Seeing those women in their cute workout clothes, bouncing up and down - ugh. It pissed me off. Go hide in a gym like a decent person. But I know they won't. They want the world to see their efforts, they flaunt it. I bet they also spend their lunch hours reciting the total caloric count of breakfast and lunch to their less diet-inclined coworkers. Poor saps. If their coworkers were in better shape maybe they could muster the strength and imagination to strangle the bitches. Kinda ironic, huh?

5:38 AM

I have frequently said if I wanted to see the sunrise that I would stay up rather than get up to see it. And yet, here I am, voluntarily crawling out of bed at dawn to hike around the local park. Besides the obvious health benefit, I am getting to see some really great sunrises.

This morning's walk started out in the dark. It was almost eerie especially as I came to the section of the path completely canopied by trees. Again the soccer fields were covered in a light fog but it was also up on the pathway. Instantly it reminded me of the sunken garden in college. It was in the foundation of a long-ago burned building, quietly nestled behind the Joseph Baldwin memorial. After a long night of "studying" I would walk across campus, diverting to the sunken garden to hang out for a few minutes. The fog was thick, muffling the regular sounds of night. It was too awesome, too comforting for it to be spooky. I kept out of my mind the reports of old Joseph Baldwin roaming the gardens in specter form. Maybe he knew I was there in peace and appreciation to try to haunt me.

As I neared the softball diamonds the sky was lightening. It's impossible to not be poetic when nature paints such gentle strokes of pastel above you. Then my mind wandered to that crazy roadtrip with my brother. We had driven through the night to cross Kansas. Around 4 AM we pulled over in a gas station parking lot to catch a few zzz's. After 2 hours of napping we woke up to the most glorious sunrise.
Maybe the photograph doesn't quite capture the essence - flat fields as far as you can see with the gentle strokes of pink and lavender overhead. It was the same no matter what direction you looked. Being from the land of trees it was stunning to see that sunrise can envelope the entire sky.

This morning was almost chilly. I'm hoping that the walks continue to inspire curiosity as well as great memories. I hope I don't bore of any of it, but cold temps could easily keep me inside.

Week Two

I'm keeping up with my morning walks! YAY!!!!

I've missed a few days here and there, but I'm not beating myself up for it especially since the next day I get out the door. There aren't any roosters in this urban area, no we have bunny rabbits and squirrels. Lots of 'em. Today, however, it was the robins that stood out. They were particularly active crossing my path at several different points. Of course there were still plenty of rabbits and squirrels.

Like most mornings a little fog was lingering over the soccer fields. I took my camera and got a few shots of it.
I like this one as it captures the fog and the sunrise. The belltower is pretty cool too.

The camera was a little bit of a pain in the ass so I probably won't continue bringing it with me. I get a pretty good stride going and have to hold the camera so it doesn't bounce around my chest. Getting bruised on the morning walk might deter me in the future.

Another Walk

Yippee I managed another walk this morning! Aren't you proud of me? I really hope this blog doesn't turn into my exercise diary because that would be boring. But I might tell you about my walks because so far they haven't been boring.

Today a woman was walking her yellow lab puppy. Little dude totally didn't get the concept of taking a walk. He was bouncing all around tethered by a stupid leash. He was excited to jump on the grass and he was excited to prance on the asphalt and yippee there's a sign post to sniff!!! Out of nowhere he just dropped creating a fur blob on the ground, begging for a jogger to pet his cuteness. She fell for it. Then we parted ways. I'm sure he was still bouncing by the time they got home.

Then I saw a possum. It was a baby and almost cute. I've seen these things in not so cute mode, cornering my pit bull with hissing and sharp teeth. Does anyone else see the irony here? A big vicious flesh ripping pit bull and a rodent so wimpy his biggest defense is playing dead? Poor Bandit was absolutely terrified by this freak and to be honest it had the snot scared out of me. The little guy I saw today also wasn't playing dead. He stopped and stared at me and then darted towards a tree behind me. I followed him and actually snapped a picture. I'm not sure the quality of this photo since it was on my phone and I haven't tried to download it yet. I mean I need something to do at work today, right?

WooHoo! Another successful phone download! This excites me more than accomplishing day four's walk. You can barely see it, but there is in fact a baby possum clinging to the tree.



















AND THEN I downloaded yesterday's picture of the hawk. There really were three hawks lined up on that soccer goal. By the time I got close enough that you can even recognize that this was a soccer goal the birds flew off, but one stopped on the fence. You can barely see it, the itty bitty white dot just behind the goal - that is, in fact, a hawk.

I Took A Walk

Life lesson number one: Never say never.

I swore I would never be one of those people who would take walks. I'm not sure how I envisioned getting exercise into my world, but it certainly was not going to be through walking. But I also spent the first half of my life being the skinniest person in the room. I didn't need to contemplate exercise.

And here I am double the size I was in high school, very frustrated as I teeter on the 200 mark on the scale. It's time. I've reached my breaking point. Something has to be done and I really need to get my body moving to overcome this fabulous couch potato physique.

For quite some time I have been after myself to start walking. Two years ago I moved practically spitting distance from a beautiful park with a nature trail. Four years previous to that I lived exactly five houses away from a school that had several paths perfect for walking. Committing myself to walk has loomed over my head for several years. But it's soooooo... much effort.

Knowing my issues with morning - I really should blog on my morning persona since I'm among the living dead before 9am on any given day - I never even contemplated doing my walks in the morning. I figured I would get home and take my walks in the early evening. Unfortunately when I get home my brain is focused on dinner and relaxing. I don't have a terribly stressful job, but I manage to have days that frazzle me just the same. Can you image that there are days that I have to THINK? It can be pretty exhausting at times so my first goal when I get home is to lay on the couch.

During the past several years I have started waking up, voluntarily, at 6am. This is contrary to my Night Owl pledge. At first it was out of necessity as I ensured my children woke up in ample time to make their way to school. After they left the house I would slowly start my day. Most recently I have landed nearly an hour and a half to myself. It is pure heaven. I can get online, catch up with recorded shows or dance around with my ipod.

Recent walks later in the day I discovered that I can leave my house, do an entire "lap" around the park and be back on my couch in fifteen minutes. Surely I can squeeze that into my morning routine?

Right?

So Monday morning I jumped out of bed, quickly put on something decent and headed out the door. My son was already at the bus stop when I returned home. He didn't think I would actually do it. I'm getting a lot of disbelief about my morning walks. One time, maybe two is a fluke. Actually, I'm in that crowd too. And on Tuesday I had a night filled with insomnia and overslept that morning. No walk. But yesterday and today I did repeat Monday's feat. YAY!!!!

Knowing my aversion to mornings, to exercise, to walking specifically, and my general inability to stick with anything, I have low expectations here. My goal is to do one month of walking. I'm not even committing myself to every day, just a couple times a week for a month. At that point I will assess my progress.

I make no promises as to what will come of that assessment. That is too much pressure. Just dealing with the day at hand is my real goal. And knowing myself it could be January before I remember to take my one month assessment (it's currently August). That's okay. In fact that is what I hope happens.