Just A Little Advice

Oh how I love to give advice - just ask and I will freely share my opinion.  And let me tell you, I can form an opinion on just about anydamn topic.  Can't make a decision for shit, but I have plenty of opinions.

Last night I received an email from a friend, a long, very venty, very ranty email.  I so know her pain.  I've been there and that is probably why she sought me out.  It took a while to pluck out the heart of the problem and help focus her energy.  Today we've exchanged several emails, slowly whittling down to the issue at hand.

So I'm reading through blogs on my sidebar and The Goat has a link to Astrostyle horoscopes

And what do I read for Leo?

Just call yourself the Friend Whisperer and call it a day. You find yourself connecting with people on a far deeper level than usual. You tune into their pain and sense where they need healing. Give the gift of your listening and thoughtful feedback and you could change someone’s life. 

I love reading stuff like this.

But honestly, I hope I helped.  What she's experiencing is still a raw wound for me.  Stupid self-obsessed, glory whores.  They ruin all the good things in life...  I better quit here or else this will turn into a long venty, ranty blog post.  I'll spare you.  

Baby Parakeets

When my brother moved I became the proud owner of his several birds. I already had one, a gift from one of my candle customers (from back when I sold candles, thus the name QandleQueen... and the crowd goes "OOOOOOOOH"). Skeeter was a randy little boy and L.O.V.E.D. my thumb in some rather disturbing ways.

 (Skeeter - Dewey - Shrek/Fiona)

So my brother gives me two female birds much to the DEE-light of Mr. Skeeter. Of course us stupid humans didn't know they were female and gave them boy names - Dewey and Shrek. The girls battled something fierce for nesting rights (still clueless humans wondering WTF) and eventually started laying eggs. One day Dewey suffered a rather fierce attack by the now renamed Fiona and later died. Fiona and Skeeter became love birds. Fiona sat on her eggs and then would hide them after they failed. I have quite a collection of tiny parakeet eggs. But eventually she stuck with it and two years ago WE HAD BABIES!

(please excuse the filthy cage - there was no way for me to disturb the nest without risking my hand getting gnawed off - I also started pouring food directly on the floor of the cage so momma and later babies could feed easily)

Last year Skeeter died and the babies, named Squeak and Squawk, were much too wild to handle.  I made the difficult decision to give them away.  It's woefully quiet in my house these days and I do miss my loving little blue bird.

Summer Thunderstorm

There is just nothing like a summer storm blowing into town. Here in the midwest they don't just bubble up out of nowhere, although sometimes it seems like it. No, the wind kicks up and the clouds gather. For several hours there are SIGNS that something in the atmosphere is brewing and it's just a matter of time before it breaks loose. These storms can bring hail and the much dreaded tornado, but those too have warning signs other than your television show being interrupted for the ninetieth time by a stoked forecaster predicting doom and gloom. Fortunately, last night's storm held no such sign, the forbidding green sky (and yes, the sky literally turns GREEN when tornadoes are likely). It was just a hot, volatile night, perfect for lightening and thunder.

There was one particular crack of lightening, I swear it hit something. It was loud and very bright. I ran outside to see if there was any smoke or sign of what was hit, but it wasn't likely I would see anything because it was somewhere in the distance. And then... the thunder. It was tremendous. And it rolled and rolled and rolled. You could just hear it tumbling through the massive clouds, on and on. So I waited for the next lightening strike. None of the ones after that big one was nearly as spectacular, but the thunder was vocal so I grabbed my camera and recorded it. There's nothing to see as it's dark outside, but turn up the volume. I kept recording until I could no longer hear the rumble in the distance, but that isn't evident on the video as it cannot pick up the subtle sound near the end.

The little clicking sounds are the camera trying to focus - ha IT DARK OUTSIDE YOU IDIOT. And yes, the birds were tweeting like mad. Mostly you hear robins. At the very very end is my son cracking up (literally. Don't you love teen boys with their cracky voice changes?)

Sunday In My City - June 27, 2010

Welcome to my city...

And you know what?  It's insufferably HOT.  The only relief is staying inside... or...

PLAYING IN THE SPRINKLERS!

Click the button and check out everyone else's city

Oatmeal Cookies

I'm not the best cooking blogger as I didn't bother to snap pictures as I was concocting so you'll just have to fly blind like I did.  This particular recipe was in the bigass haul of clipped recipes I bought at an estate sale.  I have no clue where she got it but it's clearly clipped from a magazine therefore I'm unable to credit the author.

3 cups quick-cooking oats
1 cup all purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1/2 teaspoon salt
3/4 cup butter or margarine, at room temp
1 cup granulated sugar
1/4 cup granulated fructose (since I really don't stock that on my shelves I took a wild guess and substituted brown sugar.  Do this.  It was awesome.  Seriously, who has granulated fructose? And if you're all smart and know they are the same thing, don't say anything.  I'm feeling smart and smug)
1 1/2 teaspoon vanilla
1 large egg
1/4 cup water
1 cup raisins
1 1/4 cups coursely chopped walnuts.  (I used whole pecans because that's what we had on hand - I'm allergic to walnuts- and he likes big pieces.  OH maybe I should note that I never sampled these cookies because of the nuts.  I can eat very small amounts of non-walnuts and I put a shitload of them in the batter -more than the recommended cup and a half, like covered a baking sheet)  Spread the nuts in a shallow baking pan (like I said, I covered that bastard).  Bake in 350° oven, stirring often, 10 to 15 minutes (or SEVEN, seriously when it gets a pleasant fragrance pull them out) until a rich golden brown.  Cool before using (so don't be a dumbass like me and mix all of your shit and then read the goofy note at the bottom of the recipe about toasting your nuts, thus the reason I put this little detail at the beginning of the ordeal.  I'm a giver)

Heat oven to 350°.  Mix oats, flour, baking soda and salt (isn't that all of the dry ingredients?  Bet the next set of directions is to mix the wet stuff).  In a large bowl beat butter, sugar, fructose/brown sugar and vanilla (mmmhmm) with an electric mixer on medium speed until fluffy.  Beat in egg and water until blended.

With mixer on low speed gradually add flour mixture; beat just until blended.  (They're high, this is kind of a dry dough and I eventually had to use my hands to get it fully mixed)  With a wooden spoon (or your hands since they're already dirty) stir in nuts and raisins (oh I didn't have any raisins so we just did without - poor hubby). 

(Stash the bowl of dough in the fridge for 10 minutes before baking and return it to the fridge between batches.  My SIL taught me this little trick for drop cookies and they turn out with a nice soft center so I do this for all the cookies I ever make.  So do it because I said it works)

Scoop dough (it has some note referring to page 79 but we're both SOL on that since granny didn't bother to keep that info) or drop by heaping tablespoonfuls 2 inches apart on an ungreased cookie sheet.  (make sure to kinda smash them down because these don't spread out).

Cool on sheet about 1 minute before removing to racks to cool completely.  Makes 36 (I think I made mine larger and I didn't bother to count)

The Husband LOVED these.  He liked that I used pecan halves and he REALLY liked them toasted.  He said that released a flavor that made them very yummy.  Which means I'm going to have to toast those fuckers every damn time now.

Enjoy

Friday Fragments - June 25, 2010

Friday Fragments is a great opportunity to review the bits and pieces of the week, to post little fragments that don't quite make a full post. Click the button and follow the fun!

*I'm firmly back into my routine of morning walks.  YAY me!  I've even coerced The Husband to venture out once this week.  We've yet to establish a routine for him, but we're working on it.
*Are you watching the World Cup?  I'm not a sports watcher or follower... or really a fan, but I feel compelled to follow the American team.  So I had The Husband record Wednesday's game and then we watched when I got off work.  On fast forward.  Yes, we blew through a 3.5 hour game in twenty-eight minutes.  We did slow it down for the last five minutes and DAMN! What a fine game!  We have Saturday's game already set up to record.  And yes, we plan to watch it the same way on fast forward.

*I successfully pulled another office prank. *Insert cheesy smile*  My prank buddy walked into the bathroom and I tried to grab the door from her but she got inside and locked it before I could (single seater with a real door - not a stall).  So I pulled one of the waiting area chairs (big livingroom style heavy chair) and put it in front of the door and SAT IN IT.  While she was in there I truly hoped this was a quick trip because it could really be embarrassing.  Fortunately she was quick and as soon as she realized the door was blocked, she screamed my name.  HOW DID SHE KNOW?  tee hee

*This weekend is devoted to clearing off the table with the Wii and computer so I can set up my sewing machine again.  I have a few projects brewing in my head and they need to come out or I might explode.  I promise to take pictures, but understand it might not be until November before you see anything.  Do I need to clarify that would be pictures of my craftiness and not my head exploding???  Prank Buddy might be reading so some things need to be drawn out for her. (Hey, Butt Nugget, you officially have an office nickname!)  She is soooooooooooooo gunna get me.

Writing Project

Alright, this is pretty awesome.  A friend's daughter had a writing project to describe the stories behind a couple of famous paintings.  *I have mom's full permission to reproduce Kiddo's work here*  Kiddo is ten years old, a total pain in my ass, creative as all get out, AND FUNNY!  Seriously, skooch aside whatever you're working on and devote a few minutes here.  Make sure you finish whatever is in your mouth so you don't blow it out your nose.  The first one is "awwww" but keep reading.  And I mean it, don't drink.  okay?

You've been warned.

First THIS is Kiddo's rendition of Van Gogh's Starry Night (Completely FABULOUS right???)

And the story she wrote to go with it:

The lonely girl

On this beautiful starry night something so beautiful so precious this is the story......

A little girl in a foster home always wanted to see her parent's grave.  She always heard the beautiful things about her parent's graveyard.  The moon shines like a silver medallion in the sky.  The stars were like mini suns.  And the sky was a beautiful mixture of many colors.  The little girl's parent's died when she was 3 years old in a deadly fire the little girl decide to go see her parent's grave.  She walked for 2 days until she approached her parent's grave yard.  She looked around and as she was told every thing was true.  The stars were like mini suns.  The sky was a mixture of many colors.  And the moon was like a silver medallion shining in the sky.  The moon was shining on a grave and 1 grave only.  The little girl approached the grave and as the moonlight stillshining on that only grave she read aloud Marybeth and Justin Martin lay here R.I.P the little girl started to cry as if she rembered the day of the fire when all she had was gone.  The little girl cried so hard until she could cry no longer.  Then the wind said don't cry it will be ok, don't worry. The little girl got up and took those words went through the beautiful grave yard and called this her starry night and went back to the foster home.  And the very next day a ver caring family adopted the little girl.  The family that adopted the little girl, their little girl died in a fire when she was 3.  So the little girl had the best family she could ever imagine having.  And the family that adopted the little girl lives by her parent's grave yard.

Next picture - American Gothic (the old farmer couple with the pitchfork)

Camera Flashes

A couple from a town can change the way you think of smiling read on if you want to see the way of change............

A couple from a town long ago became famous in a flash of a picture.  There town was called Vangoughing.  The Founder of the town Vincent Vangough needed a picture of a family for his museum.  So he found a family that he though t was good for him.  So on the day of the picture he posed the family and he counted down 5...4...3....2....1...FLASH the camera flashed and after the flash the couple screamed AHHHHHH with so much passion.  The couple was never so scared.  It was a disaster in a flash.  The man was a firecracker and the woman was the fire.  Together they bother were a flashing firework.  Vangough just walked away and never came back to that town again.  The couple never ever smiled again...............

This all happened after 1 camera flash.  Just 1 camera flash is a disaster waiting to happen.  Did this story change way of smiling to you?

Next - The Scream

Tornadoes strike a man

In Florida their was 1 man.  A very loud and scary man.  He is called the screamer.  He screams when he hears about tornadoes.  When he was a young boy and he lived in Florida.  There was a tornado.  He has always been afraid of tornadoes.  He screams to block out the voices of people who talk about tornadoes.  His screams were like bombs.  And people heard he is like your mother when she is mad.  The people of Florida made a picture of the screamer his hands are coughed [covered] over his ears and of course he is screaming at you.  The picture is really weird but people say it like a pound of gold.

Some advices for you......... don't talk about tornadoes around certain people... keep these words as a resource so you 1....so don't get screamed at and 2... so you don't becoe a screamer..................ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

The End

Next - The Thinker

The Thinking Machine

The photo of this statue was taken 50 years ago.  A man called the Thinker (bob Johnson is his real name).  Bob was the thinker of Twin peak (a small town in New York).  If the kids asked the thinker a question the thinker would answer that question as fast as a bullet.  The thinker was the most famous person 50 years ago.  After the thinker past away the town people made a staue as brilliant as Albert Einstein that statue is called the thinker statue.

Finally - Mona Lisa

The Mona

Did you ever think why Mona Lisa is smiling well did you?  I think Mona Lisa is smiling because she just got married to Mr. Lisa.  She is as happy as a puppy when it is playing.  the painter said smile so she smiled as big as a kindergartner on their picture day.  I also think Mona Lisa is smiling because she was the first person to win a million dollars on who wants to be a millionaire.  Mona Lisa was a sparkler on the 4th of July.  Mona Lisa was also the first person to buy a mansion.  These are some things why I think Mona Lisa is smiling.

Don't you agree that we will see Kiddo's name on bookshelves in just a few years?  She's awesome.

Summer Thistle

Happy Birthday Piranha!

Today is Piranha's birthday.  And let's get serious, this only means that MY birthday is a mere THIRTY-SIX days away.  I do hope you've done your shopping by now.  It also means that Booty's birthday is exactly two months away.  Basically, the Birthday Season hath begun.

We are giant kids about the whole thing.  Each of our birthdays require an individual celebration.  We prefer cake and plenty of alcohol.  Ripcord's birthday is just a few days away from mine, but she doesn't give a rat's ass about cake, just plenty of alcohol dammit.  But she's not an old hag like us three bitches so we wouldn't bother making her a cake anyway.

Okay, so what's the deal with cake anyway? 

Many years ago... like THIRTY... Booty and I made a cake for Piranha and let loose with the food coloring.

It's not quite a tradition as we don't make a cake every damn time, but it's quite a gift when we do.  They've made me a cake, all three of us have made cakes for spouses and for other hangers-on in our group.

We prefer making colorful, 3D cakes

(Piranha Cake - complete with Barbie leg in the mouth)

(Grilled Cheese Cake)

(Mary Poppins Purse Cake - with an umbrella and beach towel and coloring books inside)

(White Trash Trailer Park Cake - satellite dish on top and car missing tires in the yard)

Today is an anniversary.  THIRTY YEARS of making whacked out cakes.  More over, it means I've been hanging out with these whores for thirty years which is simply impossible as I'm only twenty-five.  But that blue bug was the first.  The beginning.  And it was for our treasured friend, Piranha.  She had no clue what we were up to and her reaction was priceless which is what we strive for.

Hello Summer!

Does anything epitomize summer better than the beach?  The blazing sun, the searing heat, the scorching sand?  Yes, yes, THAT is summer.  Sadly no such thing exists in St. Louis... well, we have the blazing sun, the searing heat, scorching asphalt AND insufferable humidity.  All we lack is a quick run into the roaring waves to cool off.  No we have to drive across several states to find any such relief (or stay inside).

Of course, the first time I took the kids to the beach it was the swan song of my little camera.  I figured the film was toast.  A little metal piece kept snagging the film and once I had to open the camera to get it to advance.  I went ahead and had it developed.  I was quite surprised that I had any photos whatsoever, but also, I managed some unique texture people work pretty hard to get Photoshop to achieve.

Sunday In My City - June 20, 2010

Last week I was in Kansas City to do a little genealogy research.  One of our destinations was the National Archives that happens to be located in a section of downtown devoted to federal facilities, like the IRS and Federal Reserve.  Also in the neighborhood is the Liberty Museum or the WWI National Monument.  Ian REALLY wanted to visit it.
But first he wanted me to take a picture of the giant dinosaur outside of another museum.  This amused him to no end.

It was stunning how much land was devoted to the memorial

(The dinosaur is next to the fountain)

Inside was a garden filled with poppies

The Tower looked like it swayed when you stood under it and looked up.

Climbing The Family Tree

I've been doing this genealogy thing for nearly 15 years.  It started out quite innocently with a page from my parent's wedding album.  I sat with a list of my grandparents, great-grands and great-great-grands in front of the internet.  Suddenly a whole world opened up to me.

Once upon a time, searching for your family history involved copious amount of time and patience and travel.  Here I was pulling names and birth dates and wedding dates and death dates right and left with very little effort at all.  I quickly learned to not take the first drops of information as fact, to check and double-check and corroborate, the core of my history degree.  Who knew this is how I would utilize that education? 

And who knew this would become a passion?

I can easily point out my great-grandparents in this picture, the two on the left.  I can also tell you their parents' names, their siblings and for my great-grandmother her grandparents, great-grandparents, and their migration from Tennessee. 

Certain names pop out, one never knows when a distant cousin will be met and maybe they will know someone who has been working on the family history.  Always looking for links.  Always.

What is frustrating... no not finding a great-grandparent with absolutely no data, no those are "challenges," the harder to find the more rewarding once found... the truly frustrating thing are the various family members who ask for a copy of the family tree - um really?  You want all TEN THOUSAND names neatly etched onto a "tree" for easy viewing, maybe to put up in a frame in the back den?  Or do you want a copy of my THREE HUNDRED family worksheets?  There is no "finished product" to distribute and share.  It's more of a reference encyclopedia specific to the people related to me.  Even my mother and I have different searches as she researches my step-father's family and I research my ex-husband's family.  There is no quick and easy form to hand over and share with another person.

Also frustrating are the non-related people who would like to employ me to search their histories.  Oh my my, are you really ready for that bill?  And the time?  And the lack of answers?  And the new questions raised also with possibly no answer?  I've been doing this for fifteen years and only one line has solidly reached beyond 1820.  The line which will be my link into the Daughters of the American Revolution, piggybacking on a great-great-aunt's research.

Don't get me wrong, I would love to help anyone delving into their own genealogy.  The teacher in me would thrive in assisting someone else in their search.  But the searches I've done are my own.  They are unique to my line and while I readily share with other researchers working on the same line, I do so with all sorts of insecurity as it may not be absolutely correct.  Likewise I accept assistance from others with the same caution.  Check, double-check, corroborate.

It's work.

It's work I love, but it is work.  And that alone is what keeps people away.  It's what separates the devoted from the dabblers.  It's what generates the fanatics who take days off work to travel to Kansas City to sit in a library for ten hours.

You have to be careful talking to these fanatics.  One simple question can open up a whole one-sided conversation telling you all about 3xgreat-grandpa who fought and died in the Civil War and left behind a widow... do you want to see her picture?  And then hear about the tragic deaths of each of her fifteen children?  Sometimes it's best to just nod and murmur something about it being an interesting hobby and then RUN LIKE HELL.  Unless you WANT to engage that conversation.  Us fanatics can never tell how much you want to hear so if you continue to encourage us, then we'll keep talking.

So what's the attraction?  For me it's finding out where I came from.  I wasn't raised with a large family.  I didn't spend every Sunday surrounded by throngs of cousins and aunts and uncles.  I don't know my family story.  What I've heard have only been whispers and rumor.  I have no concept of a large family, until I started digging through our history.  Suddenly I'm related to all sorts of people and I'm learning their stories.  I'm forming a connection to the past I never had before.  That's exciting.

It would be cool to find out I'm related to someone famous, but for the most part my family were poor farmers.  There is no fame, no royalty to be found.  But that's okay.  This is my family.  It's where I came from.

More than anything it's the thrill of the chase.  When one hurdle is overcome, there will be another and another.  And each one has an answer... somewhere.  I love puzzles and this is the grandest of all puzzles ever.  This is FUN.

Friday Fragments - June 18, 2010

Oh so much to catch up since last Friday...

*Sitting at work on Friday I pulled up my Facebook page with a friend request from my step-sister!  I've been searching for her for several years.  Friday night we had a wonderful phone call.  So wonderful.  Now we'll have to figure out a way to visit.

*On Sunday my mom and I headed to Kansas City for a little genealogy research.  Due to a set of last minute circumstances I ended up bringing my thirteen year old along for the trip.  I was fully expecting my research time to be hindered by a kid bored out of his wits.  OH MY GOD!  He was a perfect angel.  Not only was he quiet and not pacing, he actually participated in the search.  He did a little gopher work for the other people in our group, but he spent most of his time with his own family worksheets filling out a tree based on my sheets.  Then he rolled up his sleeves and started real research.  In his father's line is a relation to President James Buchanan (I think it's through the President's brother).  Ian found an 1860 census of the President in the White House so it delineated the other occupants such as servants that lived there.  I thought that was pretty damn cool.  He also found some discrepancies in my work, the little shit.

On Monday we spent all day (9am to 9pm) at the new Midwest Genealogy Library.

In return for sitting through an entire day at the library with his mother and grandmother, we let him loose in the hotel pool.

On Tuesday we went to the National Archives

What a hidden gem!  There are 16 regional archive centers housing federal documents relative to that region.  The historian in me was nearly hyperventilating - primary documents right there!  AND IT'S FREE!  They gave our group a little tour, even taking us into one of document storage facilities.  Yes, behind us are real live files.  SO COOL.  Each of the facilities host traveling exhibits.  While we were there they were dismantling "Deadly Medicine" about the Nazi medical experiments.  We did, however, get to tour the Levenworth Prison display.

I can see returning to the facility when I am more prepared with specific searches.  I didn't really get anything special as a result of this trip other than some dedicated time to focus solely on research, but it was online research that I can easily do at home.  This trip was my first ever with any genealogy group so I kept my expectations low, just getting a feel for what types of things I would need to know for future trips.  I'm glad I got to go and, better yet, Ian had a good time and has a very solid interest in research.

*My desk fiasco from last week is possibly working out to a satisfying solution.  I spent Friday settling into the cubicle at least giving it a chance.  I pulled the office manager to my space and showed her how much space I lost as a result of the new furniture.  By that time the whining had subsided and I was able to communicate how this would impact my job performance.  I left it open ended, but I knew to sit quiet was doing ME a disservice.  When I returned from Kansas City I talked to my supervisor and we formulated a couple of options to present the office manager as a way to solve my work space issues.  One of the options was openly accepted as the best possible compromise.  It looks like I should be packing my stuff again.  While I'm still sad over the loss of my favorite table in the entire world, this is a very doable solution.  YAY!

*Yesterday was my older son's 21st birthday.  The last three days have been devoted to him, so pull it up and join the celebration.  He was supposed to join us for dinner yesterday, but it looks like lunchtime celebrations with his friends extended later into the day than he expected.  That's okay, he can have special mom-time next week.

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